Happy Halloween, Wiccans!

The local paper did an article about a local Wiccan follower, and I will give them some credit: They didn’t make her look like an idiot (which is usually what happens in these kinds of articles). The_Nightmare_Before_Christmas121510

They still described the rituals her religion has her do, and to someone not familiar, it would seem strange. They “party with the dead,” says the headline. I mean, after all, it’s not like she believes in a real religion, where they drink the blood and eat the flesh of their savior during their rituals.

Any religion seems silly and weird if you observe it from a distance with a cynical eye and phrase it in such a way to take the meaning out of whatever they’re doing.

So let me just say Happy Halloween to my Wiccan friends. And to everyone else, too!

A Mission from God

One of the main reasons many Tea Party members are so stubborn is because they are on a Mission From God.

They sincerely believe that these are the End Times and Jesus will be here soon. Of course, religious fanatics have been making such predictions since the year 666, but somehow the fact that every single one of them have been wrong again and again doesn’t deter these folks. last130529All the signs were present last time, but they’re really present this time so it’s bound to be true!

Loony Michelle Bachmann is one of those believers. “The baton of global leadership has been passed by America to the Mullahs, the Marxist world, and other dark forces,” she stated recently, all but calling Obama the AntiChrist. “Rather than seeing this as a negative, we need to rejoice, Maranatha, come Lord Jesus, His day is at hand.” I am not making this up.

This is important because, like many religious fanatics, they are convinced that they and they alone know the true meaning of whatever holy book they wave around, and everyone else is a heathen who just doesn’t get it. And, not surprisingly, many of these same people identify with the Tea Party and their fanatics. They believe they are fighting for God — against those who would allow abortions, against those evildoers who would encourage gay marriage, against the unwashed who would support taxing the very rich. (I’m not exactly sure how that last one matches what is in the Bible, but they seem to think very strongly that it’s important.)

And that’s why compromise is not possible with these people. They think they are performing God’s will, and if we oppose them, then clearly we must be working for the Devil. There is no other possibility in their black-and-white simple little worldview.

Just ask Justice Antonin Scalia, who believes the Devil is in the details. “In the Gospels, the Devil is doing all sorts of things. He’s making pigs run off cliffs, he’s possessing people and whatnot. And that doesn’t happen very much anymore. It’s because he’s smart. He just got wilier.” In this interview, he made it pretty clear that he believes that evil in the world is caused by the Devil, who is apparently a lobbyist and probably a Democrat too. It’s the only thing he can come up with to explain how it is possible people could disagree with him.

Politics is the art of compromise. Compromise is what reasonable adults do in order to accomplish things. It is not, however, what fanatics do, because otherwise they’ll burn in Hell.

So the next time you wonder why these crazy politicians refuse to compromise, keep in mind that they don’t care about this world — they’re just trying to work their way into the next.

Editorial cartoon of the day

Shocking News: Pope Reads Bible

In a stunning announcement, the Pope revealed today that he has broken with longstanding Catholic tradition and has done the unthinkable. He has read the Bible.

“I have reviewed the teachings of Jesus thoroughly,” he said to gasps, “and I can’t find anything in there about hating gays, being against abortion, or disallowing contraception. There is, however, quite a bit about how the rich cannot get into heaven and how we should be doing everything in our power to help the poor and downtrodden.”

Numerous conservative politicians have spoken out against His Holiness, with one stating, “What in the world is he doing reading the Bible? You don’t need to read the Bible to know what it says! Look at me — I’ve never read the Constitution, and I know it says that this is a Christian nation.”

An atheist lives his own moral code

by Guest Blogger David Ehrhart

I had my “Atheism” tested today. I use quotations for that descriptor, because I don’t enjoy how the name of my belief system basically means “rejecting someone else’s belief system.” I should probably choose another word for it, but I’m getting ahead of myself …

Today, while driving home from work, I had a thought-provoking experience. As I found myself in the passing lane, gaining on a semi in the right lane, I suddenly beheld another car approaching incredibly fast behind the truck. As the space between my car and the semi quickly diminished, the third driver accelerated even more, dangerously cutting across in front of me to zip up and beyond the truck. He then merged back into the right lane almost immediately, but found whatever his next assuredly reckless driving stunt would have been to be blocked by traffic further up the road. As I found myself gaining on him in the passing lane, I looked over into his driver’s side window and entertained a few ideas. I thought I might give him the finger. I thought I might curse at him loudly enough that my voice would somehow magically project through my music, my passenger side window, the wind, his driver side window, and his potential music as well. I thought about doing both at the same time. I didn’t do any of that, but as I looked over at the man, who I believe was roughly my age, give or take a few years, I saw something dangling from his rear view mirror: a large, clearly visible crucifix.

Moments later my off-cutter zipped up an exit ramp and out of my view, and in his absence I found myself pondering a simple question with a potentially profound meaning: “What if he had killed us?”

I was raised as a Lutheran, attended church regularly in my youth, was baptized, confirmed, took Communion, served as the Crucifer in many a service, and even stood as the Pastor’s assistant in a few others. Yet somewhere in my college years I began to part with faith, calling myself an “Agnostic” for a few years until I became brave enough to accept the fact that I truly was what many would describe as an “Atheist.” My thinking became more scientific in nature. For more reasons than I can count, I came to “believe” that if it couldn’t be proven, I couldn’t accept it, whatever it was. Blame my psychology coursework if you will, but I have come to believe that it is easier for Man to have created God, than for God to have created Man. I in no way mean to offend others who do have faith when I say these things, because I believe that it is every human’s right to believe whatever they want to believe. But over the years, being the helping professional that I am, I have developed my own code and my own principles. It was taught to me by my professors, my supervisors, and those whom I continue to serve. The core of my belief system is to ”do no harm.”

So as I drove and pondered, I asked myself a variety of questions, trying my best to weigh the differences of my beliefs and the beliefs which were being announced by the other driver’s crucifix, assuming that the car wasn’t borrowed or stolen. If he had misjudged the distance between my car and the semi, if he hadn’t gone fast enough, if he was momentarily blinded by the afternoon sun’s reflection off of, say, anything, what might have happened differently? If we crashed and both of us died, and I was “wrong” in my Atheism, would I go to Hell? Being a Christian, would he go to Heaven? Would he need to ask his God for forgiveness before he drew his final breath to be absolved of his sin? Would he have needed to go to confession instead? Which version of Christianity would need to hold true for him to ascend? Would my good works mean nothing at the Pearly Gates, since I didn’t believe until beholding them “in person”? Would I be stuck in some kind of Purgatory or Limbo? Would the Christian God be a vengeful God and smite my spirit, or simply wave his omnipotent hand at my mortal transgressions if I apologized to Him? Would I be damned to an eternity of suffering because I refused to stop asking questions about the truth of life and the Universe? Would we blink out of existence altogether, turn into fertilizer, or reincarnate into cats?

Not being a Christian, I still live a life filled with acts that might resemble those of a Christian. I follow the majority of the Ten Commandments, without even needing to think about them, or how they are connected to the belief in a God. I spend the majority of my waking hours working with people in their darkest hours of mental instability. I volunteer to raise dogs to assist blind people in living fuller lives. I carry heavy things for weaker people and hold doors for the elderly. I speak respectfully, wait my turn, and enjoy teaching children about goodness. I love my fellow humans, and I love my world. I attempt to do the most good I can, and the least harm I can. I do these things because they are right to do, and while they may have been influenced by a Christian perspective in my upbringing, I don’t need to believe in a God to know that they are the right things to do. Plenty of other religious and other systems of thought and belief promote the same thing. We are a people who need each other. We exist because of each other. We exist for each other.

The Sixth Commandment, as I understand it, is “Thou Shalt Not Kill.” Allow me to be so bold as to broaden my interpretation of it to “Thou Shalt Not (Willfully Engage in Seriously Dangerous Behavior That Will Increase The Probability For You To) Kill (Others).” I hope it’s not too big of a stretch. What upsets me is that people too often wear or otherwise display symbols of faith, and then behave in a manner contradictory to the principles of said faith. This is one of the greatest reasons I find myself not adhering to any specific religious beliefs or doctrines, Christian or otherwise. If a “believer” isn’t required to be a living testament of their beliefs, why believe in the first place? And I’m sorry, but if asking for forgiveness from your God after you might have killed me is enough to secure your place in Heaven, only one of us is really making out on the deal.

Do no harm. It’s something I strive for daily, and something I encourage in others, and it isn’t terribly different from the aforementioned Commandment. All of us make mistakes, certainly, but I think no matter what an individual believes, he or she has the responsibility to not purposefully enter into situations in which they can seriously harm or kill another person, lest it be in the defense of their own mortality of the mortality of someone who, in that moment, is unable to defend their own life. Willful recklessness can end so many things, because it clouds other, more rational thoughts.

As I write this, I don’t find myself clinging to anger over the dangerous situation I survived. I find myself wishing for other opportunities. What would it have been like to have spoken to that man, and to have told him of the life he endangered? I could tell him about my crazy dog Jack, the patients I help, and the wedding I want to celebrate. I could have told him about something as significant as my whole family coming together soon to commit my father’s ashes to the sea, or as trivial as what I was going to make for dinner tonight (nothing exciting, it was a Bertolli frozen meal for two). I could have shared coffee with him, and even debated over our differing belief systems. I could have shown him that another’s life matters more than potentially getting to his exit ramp just a second or two earlier. I could have learned about his life, and its significance, too.

Whatever you believe, do no harm. Whether you believe in a Christian God, a Goddess, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or something else entirely, hold yourself accountable for the principles which you claim to follow. If you believe in something that condones the disregard for or outright abuse of the rights and well-being of others, well, we have a different conversation to conduct. As best as I can tell, we only have the present, and the choices we can make within it. Consider that you have an impact on the world around you, and the people within it, and while sometimes that impact is small, other times it may just be profound. Do no harm.

David Ehrhart is a Licensed Professional Counselor, a martial artist, and an otherwise quirky human. His goals are to marry his fiancé, raise a bunch of dogs, and one day write a witty bestseller for people who want to learn new ways to improve their own mental health.

(NOTE: This is a guest blog from David Ehrhart. If you would like to submit a guest blog that fits in with the theme of “Ventrella Quest,” please contact me).

Putin, on the ritz

Hey, remember when one thing you could always count on the right wing for was its hatred of Russia?

Not any more. They just love Putin — he’s the new right wing hero.

After all, he believes in cracking down on crime, of stamping out those gays, and for forcing a state-sponsored religion upon his citizens.

I’m actually happy that they are admitting this. After all, we on the left have constantly pointed out that the things the right loves are shared by the Taliban and other haters of freedom. No abortions, no gay rights, no equal pay for women, no freedom of religion, no right not to be randomly searched — you get all that and more in Iraq and increasingly in Russia, too. The tea party crazies who proclaim “Don’t tread on me” are perfectly willing to tread on everyone else.

Now Matt Drudge has even gone so far as to proclaim Putin “The Leader of the Free World”. I am not making this up.

Rod Dreher, who blogs for The American Conservative, cheers Putin’s pro-Christian government, unlike our terrible country that has a Constitution that prevents such things. How dare we live up to the Founder’s explicit desires?

And Pat Buchanan is thrilled that Russia is fighting against the “homosexual agenda” and I assume he cheers when he sees gays getting beaten up in public places in Moscow. Why can’t America be more like that?, he wonders. (As I’ve said before, you should not be too harsh on Pat Buchanan. After all, his parents died in the holocaust. They fell off a guard tower.)

These right wing Putin-lovers, by the way, are the same people who yell that Democrats are “traitors” for suggesting that maybe we should have a national health care policy or work with the UN to solve problems around the world.

He’s not the Messiah!

Some people just name their kids really stupid things that can haunt them for lives.

But when someone in Tennessee named their kid “Messiah,” that was too much for a judge. “The word Messiah is a title and it’s a title that has only been earned by one person and that one person is Jesus Christ,” she said.

Good thing that judge wasn’t around in 1958 when Madonna’s parents were deciding on a name.

So the judge, over the parent’s objection, changed the child’s name, like a magical fairy.

I mean, while I certainly don’t want parents naming their kids “Hitler” or “Asshole,” I also don’t like the idea of the government coming in and deciding for the parents what the child’s name should be.

And it’s especially true here, where the reason for the name change was religion. That judge just didn’t want her personal religion made fun of, apparently.

Hey, wait, wasn’t there a Constitutional Amendment prohibiting this sort of thing? Like, the very first one?

Editorial cartoon of the day

Editorial cartoon of the day

The War Against Atheists

I thought I’d share this Facebook post from American Atheist President David Silverman, as it might start a nice conversation:

“This is why we are the good guys and they are the bad guys. There is no bill in any state trying to force atheism on anyone. All our moves are defensive, all the time.

Take the religion back out of science class. Give women back full rights over their own bodies. Get that religious icon back off public property. Take the religion back off the money, and back out of the Pledge. Everything, every lawsuit, every complaint, every fight we fight as a movement is all defensive, all pro-equality. We demand religion stay out of our lives, and we are hated for it by those who know we are right, but don’t want to (or can’t) admit it. We want only that which we would want done to us – equality.

The other side can’t say anything close to that. They are doing unto others as they would not want to have done to them – 2nd class citizenship or conversion. They complain about us, but we live by their ‘golden rule’ for real, while they pretend that what they do would not make Jesus puke.”

I would have used “Jesus wept” in there instead, but the point is clear: No matter how much Fox News complains about the “War Against Christians” every single lawsuit and protest has been a defensive one, and I challenge anyone to give an example where that was not the case.

49

Me and David (Tall, isn’t he?)