Texas Governor Greg Abbott has seen through our nefarious plan.
He has called out the national guard to prevent us from taking over Texas and installing our evil liberal agenda across the country!
And our plan was so perfect too! We would bring all branches of our military together to Texas under the guise of doing routine military exercises just as we have done dozens of times before, but this time they would really be there to take over Texas and install martial law! All of the top brass in the military had agreed to the action, evilly putting aside the vows they had made to the Constitution, and have done an excellent job of keeping this completely secret — in fact, to this day, they are insisting that our plan does not even exist!
Once we had taken over Texas, we would then install our plan, which is the evilest of evil! We would:
- Give health care to everyone
- Remove all barriers that discriminate against people
- Reduce the deficit
- Reform campaign finance laws
- Make the tax system fairer and reduce taxes on the vast majority of Americans
- Increase benefits to our veterans
Yes, our evil goals would finally be accomplished, and none would be able to stop us! Muhahahahaha!
But no — Texas Governor Abbott has seen through our plan and has thwarted us! His collection of weekend warriors will clearly stop the full-time professional largest-military-on-the-planet and keep us from accomplishing our nefarious goals!
Curses, foiled again!