As a criminal defense attorney, I have literally had variations of all these things said to me over the years:
1. I’m looking for a cheap lawyer.
2. I want a real lawyer, not a public defender.
3. I’ve had three other lawyers on this case and I’ve fired them all but I want to hire you now.
4. I’m just looking for someone to do my case pro bono; I don’t want to have to pay anything.
5. I need a lawyer because the government is out to get me ever since they planted the listening devices in my head.
6. I’m paying you, so you do exactly what I tell you to do.
7. I spoke to the other inmates, and they told me that the District Attorney and my Public Defender are both wrong about what the law says.
8. If I pay you extra, can you make this go away?
9. If you lose, do I get my money back?