Author: Michael A. Ventrella

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Rush Limbaugh’s history lesson

Rush Limbaugh gave his listeners a history lesson the other day. He said that “caucasians aren’t responsible for slavery” because, after all, caucasians fought a civil war in order to end slavery!

Apparently, these caucasians were fighting against robots or something, because otherwise it would …

Ah, the heck with it. Trying to point out how stupid Rush Limbaugh is? Just too easy. Instead, listen to Moxy Fruvous’ hilarious song about him. Lyrics below; song begins around 2:45 (this was the only version I could find on the net).

THE GREATEST MAN IN AMERICA

Ditto…
Ditto…
Ditto…
Ditto…

Coming from Canada, we love those leaders who personify the US way to be
There was JFK, and LBJ, and WKRP

But of these there is not one to rival
The greatest genius of them all
He’s a megalo, with a healthy glow
He’s the man called Rush Limbaugh

He’s a dose of PT Barnum
With a Mussolini twist (El duce!)
There in the limosine, parked on the lawn
He’s a goofy Ghengis Kahn

Not since Jesus Christ has the world seen someone with such widely syndicated views
Hundreds of years from now they’ll celebrate Rushmas
And Rush Hoshana for the Jews

Cause he’ll pull the plug on Feminazis
Paranoid minorities and gays
He’s a burning bush with a network push
Sure to start a countrywide blaze

He taught me to love and praise Charlton Heston
Oliver North is quite a nice man too
Forget Al and Tipper
Let’s bring back the Gipper
And Joe McCarthy too

I was a troubled soul
Consumed by voices advocating special interest groups and vice.
‘Til Rush rushed to my sweet rescue
Now I’ll never ever have to think twice

So we’ll sign a check for Limbaughism
Restore the moral fundamental core
We’ll cut the debt
And start a tet offensive on the poor

It’s a blitzkreig in the making (EVERYBODY!)
It’s distinctly upper class (Well, not everybody)
Yes sir, I’ll get the door
Roll the carpet on the floor
For a man
(for a man)
For a man
(Such a man)
For a man with his head up his …

Ditto!
Ditto!
Ditto!
Ditto!

Ask us the name of the king
It’s RUSH!

Editorial cartoon of the day

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Carlos Danger, International Man of Mystery

Anthony Weiner is the politician who was apparently created solely for the amusement of late-night comedians.

“They know it is a Democrat’s penis because it won’t stand up. And also because it was sent to a woman.” – Bill Maher

“Congressman Weiner’s Twitter account was hacked ‘allegedly,’ and someone texted a picture of his ‘junior senator’ to a college girl. Now this is good news for me because I can Google ‘wiener photos’ at work and not get fired.” – Craig Ferguson

“The only thing they have in common is that they both lean to the extreme left!” – Jon Stewart
carlos danger
“Apparently, Anthony Weiner won’t decide if he’s resigning until his wife comes back from her trip to Africa with Hillary Clinton. I don’t know what’s more ridiculous — that he thinks he can stay in office, or that he thinks his wife is coming back.” – Jimmy Fallon

“51 percent of New York voters think Congressman Weiner should keep his seat in office. The other 49 percent think that he should disinfect it.” – Conan O’Brien

“It turns out that one of the women Congressman Anthony Weiner was communicating with was a porn star. When asked how it was possible to get involved with someone in such a sleazy business, the porn star said, ‘I don’t know.'” – Conan O’Brien

“You know what’s funny? President Clinton had sex and lied about it, and he kept his job. Anthony Weiner didn’t have sex and lied about it, and lost his. I guess the lesson here is, if you’re gonna lie, have sex.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“What is Weiner guilty of? He’s guilty of being too photogenic. But is taking pictures of your junk and e-mailing them something you’d expect from a Congressman? No. This is something you’d expect from a priest.” – David Letterman

“Anthony Weiner asked Bill Clinton for advice, and actually followed it for awhile. Of course eventually he was forced to tell the truth.” – Jay Leno

“What?! The congressman had a sex scandal and had to apologize to Bill Clinton? For what?! Copyright infringement?” – Jon Stewart

“Congressman Weiner is in a lot of trouble since he tweeted those pictures. But good news for him, he just found out he’ll be allowed to keep his porn name … Anthony Weiner.” – Conan O’Brien

“Former Congressman Anthony Weiner is back on Twitter. It’s like giving Lindsay Lohan the keys to the mini bar.” – David Letterman

“After withdrawing from public life Anthony Weiner is ready to stick it back in. Folks, that takes balls. Sadly, we know he has them.” – Stephen Colbert

“Former Congressman Anthony Weiner said that he’s considering running for mayor of New York City. If nothing else I’m sure that he’ll provide some stiff competition. Come on, he’s the total package. I don’t want to be too hard on him. I don’t have a bone to pick with that guy.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Weiner said about New York, ‘Nobody will work harder to make it better.’ As opposed to his first campaign promise, which was ‘Nobody will work better to make it harder.'” –Jay Leno

And now it’s come to light that he just couldn’t help himself, and he continued to send his sexy tweets under the name “Carlos Danger.”

“Let he who has not referred to himself as Carlos Danger cast the first stone.” – Christian Finnegan

On one hand, this kind of isn’t relevant to his job. I mean, who cares? It’s not like he’s broken any laws (like, say, a certain Republican Senator who visited prostitutes). On the other hand, it certainly shows something about his character in the same way Clinton’s dallying with an intern.

So is it right that we the public should know about this?

Sure it is.

Especially when it delights the late night comics so much.

Editorial cartoon of the day

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Another welfare baby

There’s another woman living off of hard-earned taxpayer money having a baby that she doesn’t have to pay for.

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Editorial cartoon of the day

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Just wondering…

Ever notice that all the people who say that racism is over are white?

Editorial cartoon of the day

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Gathering moss

There’s been an outcry over this week’s Rolling Stone cover, featuring the Boston bomber. Some stores are refusing to carry the issue, and many people are boycotting the magazine in complaint.rolling_stone_AP13071714405_270x367

While everyone has the right to protest, and while stores have the right to not sell the magazine, I find myself more in support of the magazine than the protesters.

The best argument the protesters have is that terrorists and criminals should not be given any publicity because it could encourage copy-cats.

But then some are against the cover because then bomber “looks like a rock star” as if the magazine is promoting him — this despite the words on the cover calling him a “monster.”

But isn’t that the point of the article? Not all bad guys look like bad guys. Not all evil Mulsim terrorists look like bin Laden.

Also, this is news. Rolling Stone does cover the news too, you know — it’s not just a music magazine. It’s won awards for its news coverage. Sometimes bad guys make the news.

I don’t know, this seems kind of like punishing the messenger. The article doesn’t sympathize with him or paint him in a good light in any way; it’s an attempt to understand how a kid like that could do something so terrible.

Editorial cartoon of the day