In a move that surprised absolutely no one, a fierce right-wing politician who fights against giving rights to gays has been outed after he sent nude pictures online to another man!
I mean, what are the odds? Other than the fact that this seems to happen about once a month these days.
Rep. Randy Boehning (R — Fargo, eh?) is the latest. I wonder if his last name is pronounced “boning.” That would be fun.
It seems to me that gay men who are raised to believe that homosexuality is wrong (because of their religion, usually) have to fight their natural urges in whatever way possible, so they tend to become some of the most avid fighters against their own. It’s a way for them to say to their God, “See? I know it’s a sin and I am doing everything I can to distance myself from it!”
This also explains why they believe so strongly that being gay is a “choice.” They assume that everyone has these desires, and they are superior because they don’t act on them (except, of course, they do).
The good news is that this belief is dying out day by day and especially as more and more people reject that kind of religion in their lives. And so we can all celebrate whenever another hypocrite like this guy is exposed.
I wonder what is taking Michelle Bachmann’s husband so long.
The annual White House Correspondent’s Dinner allows the President to throw some barbs at himself and the press and is a good time to observe a President’s sense of humor first hand. Known jokingly as the “nerd prom” it gets bigger and bigger every year. And every year, I love posting the President’s best jokes. (Click here for the 2014 list and the 2013 list).
Welcome to the fourth quarter of my presidency. The fact is, I feel more loose and relaxed than ever. Those Joe Biden shoulder massages, they’re like magic. You should try one. Oh, you have.
And that’s not all people say about me. A few weeks ago, Dick Cheney says he thinks I’m the worst President of his lifetime. Which is interesting, because I think Dick Cheney is the worst President of my lifetime. It’s quite a coincidence.
Just this week, Michele Bachmann actually predicted that I would bring about the biblical end of days. Now that’s a legacy! That’s big. I mean, Lincoln, Washington—they didn’t do that.
But I just have to put this stuff aside, I’ve got to stay focused on my job, because for many Americans, this is still a time of deep uncertainty. For example, I have one friend—just a few weeks ago, she was making millions of dollars a year. And she’s now living out of a van in Iowa.
Back here in our nation’s capital, we’re always dealing with new challenges. I’m happy to report that the Secret Service, thanks to some excellent reporting by White House correspondents, they’re really focusing on some of the issues that have come up. And they finally figured out a full-proof way to keep people off my lawn.
You know what, let me set the record straight. I tease Joe sometimes, but he has been at my side for seven years now. I love that man. He’s not just a great Vice President, he is a great friend. We’ve gotten so close, in some places in Indiana, they won’t serve us pizza anymore.
As always, the reporters here had a lot to cover over the last year. Here on the East Coast, one big story was the brutal winter. The polar vortex caused so many record lows, they renamed it “MSNBC.”
But of course, let’s face it, there is one issue on every reporter’s mind and that is 2016. Already, we’ve seen some missteps. It turns out Jeb Bush identified himself as “Hispanic” back in 2009. Which you know what, look, I understand. It’s an innocent mistake. Reminds me of when I identified myself as “American” back in 1961.
Ted Cruz said that denying the existence of climate change made him like Galileo. Now that’s not really an apt comparison. Galileo believed the Earth revolves around the sun. Ted Cruz believes the Earth revolves around Ted Cruz.
Meanwhile, Rick Santorum announced that he would not attend the same-sex wedding of a friend or a loved one. To which gays and lesbians across the country responded, that’s not going to be a problem.
It’s amazing how time flies. Soon, the first presidential contest will take place. And I for one cannot wait to see who the Koch brothers pick.
It’s exciting. Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, Ted Cruz, Jeb Bush, Scott Walker. Who will finally get that red rose? The winner gets a billion-dollar war chest. I mean, seriously, a billion dollars. From just two guys. Is it just me, or does that feel a little excessive? I mean, it’s almost insulting to the candidates. The Koch brothers think they need to spend a billion dollars to get folks to like one of these people. It’s got to hurt their feelings a little bit.
And, look, I know I’ve raised a lot of money too. But in all fairness, my middle name is “Hussein.” What’s their excuse?
Bernie Sanders might run. I like Bernie. Bernie is an interesting guy. Apparently some folks really want to see a pot-smoking socialist in the White House. We could get a third Obama term after all.
So get your popcorn, it’s going to be an interesting fight. Which Super Villain will have his minion win?
Ironically, both villains want the same thing: the establishment of a permanent oligarchy in America benefiting the super wealthy at the expense of everyone else, the destruction of all welfare programs, an increase in war (which can be very profitable), and a return an the America that never existed except on TV sitcoms in the 50s.
No matter who wins in this primary battle, both villains will team up to once again fight against any Democrat at any level of government as they have done for years … so when your clueless friend says that there is no difference between the parties, be sure to ask them why then do these Super Villains only attack one side?
I loved getting the newspaper and reading the comic strips when I was growing up. I wanted to be a cartoonist. I saved my allowance to buy the latest Peanuts, Pogo, and B.C. paperbacks and then I’d read them over and over again. I created my own strips, made whole books full of them, and wormed my way into every school newspaper as their resident cartoonist.
When I visited California years ago, of course one of the things I had to do was visit the Schulz Museum in Petaluma
Although I later moved on and pursued other interests, I never stopped reading the comics. My shelves are still full of the collections, although they now include Pearls Before Swine, Get Fuzzy, Doonesbury, Lio, and many others. I even ended up writing the afterwords to a collection of Candorville strips (I’m a big fan).
Newspapers carry fewer and fewer strips these days and often the ones they do have are zombie strips — where the original artist has died and someone else is trying to recreate the original feel, which is like going to see a Robin Williams impersonator and wondering why he isn’t as funny. (I’m looking at you, Blondie. And Beetle Bailey. And Hagar the Horrible and Nancy and Dennis the Menace and…) So mostly I read comics online these days, and there is a boom of good strips online — although many would never be allowed in any newspaper.
Anyway, here is my list of the best newspaper comic strips of all time that are no longer around, in my opinion (and in no particular order.) A list of the best current strips will be posted later.
Peanuts: You cannot overestimate the importance of Peanuts to modern cartooning. Prior to Peanuts, most strips were adventure strips with continuing stories, even if they had a lot of humor to them. Strips about kids were mostly innocent and fun, and the kids rarely argued or fought (except maybe the Katzenjammer Kids from decades earlier). Peanuts created characters that people actually cared about, and was often quite funny as well. I mean, come on, I can’t not have Peanuts on this list.
Calvin and Hobbes: Great artwork combined with a wonderful memory of what it was like to be a kid made Watterson’s creation so memorable. Here it is, years since he retired the strip, and the books are still selling and Calvin is still pissing on things (none of which are approved by Watterson). I love re-reading my books every now and then.
Pogo: My parents were huge Pogo fans and had all the books, which I read over and over again. I missed a lot of the political satire when I was young, but the absurdity struck me in the same way I also loved Alice in Wonderland and Edward Lear.
Bloom County: Although at first it seemed to be a Doonesbury copy it soon established its own identity and world view which was so creative and ground-breaking I could hardly wait to get the Boston Globe each morning to read it. Breathed later retired the strip and then tried Sundays-only strip “Outland” which seemed to be more Krazy Kat than Bloom County, and it just did not have the same charm. A few of his more recent projects have also failed to captivate.
The Far Side: What a year that was, when the artists who did Bloom County, Far Side, and Calvin and Hobbes all decided to retire. The Far Side was so outrageous and funny; seriously, who doesn’t like this strip?
Li’l Abner: While I obviously disagreed with Capp’s politics and misogyny in the 60s and 70s, he had some wonderfully imaginative stories and very expressive artwork.
Popeye / Thimble Theater: This is the oldest strip on my list. Popeye started off as a one-shot character in an adventure with Olive Oyl but soon became so popular he took over. So many wonderful stories and adventures ensued, as well as the words “goon” “jeep” and “wimpy.” They have aged well and are still fun to read — well written, well drawn, with good pacing and surprises.
Yes there are more that were really good but they didn’t match up to these in my opinion. I mean, yeah, Krazy Kat and Little Nemo in Slumberland were amazing and creative for their time as well as being influential but they just don’t interest me to the point where I’d re-read them over and over again.
Back when most current religions were in their infancy, we thought we were the center of the universe. We had no idea what stars and planets really were, and in some cases, didn’t even realize the world was round. And that world? It was only a few thousand years old.
Now we know that we are one of trillions of planets, surrounding billions of stars in millions of galaxies. We know that the planet is billions of years old, dinosaurs ruled the planet for about 200 million years, and humans have only been around for a few hundred thousand.
So among the many questions I often ponder is how rational, intelligent people who still believe in these religions interpret this? Why did God create such an amazingly expansive universe and then stick us way out in the suburbs of some minor galaxy? Why did he wait trillions of years before creating the earth if it is where his chosen people were to live? Why did he allow dinosaurs to roam for the vast majority of the time on the earth before getting around to creating us in his own image?
Oh, I know that believers will find a way to rationalize this in the same way they can believe in some of the Bible 100% but 0% in the parts they don’t like, picking and choosing “ultimate truths” like options on a Chinese menu. Time means nothing to God; where he placed us is irrelevant, and so on. So why even create all this extra stuff to begin with?
I mean, if I wanted to play The Sims and create people, I could make an area for them all to live easily enough. Why would I then waste time creating 99.99999999999999999999999% space that these people will never use?
Often religious people will call atheists self-centered for not believing, but I have often wondered about someone who thinks that we are special in a universe that is vast and has existed for billions of years — how is that not self-centered?
The ability of people whose intellects I admire to rationalize all of this — well, that’s the biggest mystery of all.
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